‘Leave My Poppa Alone!’; Stress of Impeachment Hospitalizes Barron

He’s had it hard enough all the way through his father’s campaign and presidency, what with the relentless attacks on his family’s character from the left, and he’s handled it like a champ, but the new stress placed upon Barron Trump by the impeachment proceedings has proved to be too much, it seems, as he suffered a nervous breakdown in school today.

His 5th grade social studies class was discussing current events when the subject of his family’s utter humiliation and probable incarceration arose. Classmates discussed the Democrats’ initiative thoughtfully and without much passion at first, until Barron himself was asked for his input.

Barron, who has been slouching down at his desk hoping to avoid just such an interrogation, let all his feelings out:

“When are you snowflakes going to stop? It’s fake news! Just like those pictures I had under my bed that Joey told me was my mom! Not true! Fake news Joey!

My dad did nothing wrong! He’s gonna be the president forever!”

It was at this moment that young Barron slid completely under his desk and began to shudder uncontrollably, eyes wide and staring straight ahead at nothing at all, all the while sobbing, “Don’t put my poppa in jail” over and over again, as endless tears streamed down his face. Secret Service slowly helped Master Trump to his feet and led him out to a private facility in Kenkesey, where he still resides. Sadistic classmate, Joey Barron, was barely able to control his laughter as Trump was escorted out.

This is what the Democrats never see. This is the pain and anguish that is hidden from them. Surely even their cold hearts would be affected by the tears of a child. Perhaps then this witch hunt would come to an end.