Minneapolis Court Issues Bench Warrant For Maxine Waters

During the controversial trial of Derek Chauvin last week, statements were made to the public by California Democratic Representitive Maxine Waters that many people felt were “over the line.”  The radically far-left thuggish grandmother, many conservative pundits and assorted fat white boys on radio and television contend, may have affected the verdict through intimidation and threat.

While it’s always been a common-sense idea that sequestered juries don’t pay attention to such public outbursts, nor does any court judge consider “possible protests” following a verdict when adjudicating, Judge Sandy Batt of Minneapolis has nonetheless issued a bench warrant for Waters, just to make thousands of know-nothing trumptards finally get on with their diahhretic lives, for Christ’s sake.

Batt contends that the real threat to the public during these high-profile cases are obnoxious dickbag pretend legal scholors like Sean Hannity, Tucker Carlson, and whichever sheep sodomizer is popular on Newsmax, juicing up their idiot parade of near-ghosts with false information.

“Miss Waters simply advised people to take the effects of the judgement seriously, albeit a little overzealously.  You know, just like their tardhero Trump calling Mexicans criminals and rapists and labelling any newspaper or outlet who criticized him ‘an enemy of America.’  Hey, she says what she means, right outhouse Einsteins?”

The warrant calls for Waters to make herself present at the Minneapolis courthouse by 4 p.m. next Sunday at an exact time of her convenience.  The judge and a few lucky friends will join the two for a lunch at Minnesota’s swanky Superqueef Club, where they will dine on truffled lobster and thousand-dollar wine at the taxpayer’s expense.

The idea that a legal appeal can validly be made because one person said something on TV has been called : “laughably ignorant” by experts, even as it spreads across the social media pages of thousands, just above doctored photos of Michelle Obama photoshopped with a monkey.

But, you know, just like certain cops, Trumpers aren’t racist at all.