We did it, patriots. Our boycotts and picket lines have turned away customers, caused a mass of returns, and rattled the stock price of Carharrt to the tune of $100 million. Their CFO has announced that they will, effective immediately, suspend their vaccine mandate policy.
The story of hard-working, blue-collar Carharrt factory employees and forklift drivers being told they have to get the jab or lose their jobs has captured the hearts and should of patriotic Americans from coast-to-coast, leading to the change in policy.
According to the company, Carharrt had a policy that required their employees to be vaccinated, but after the public response was just too much, they had to roll it back.
According to spokesman, Art Tubolls, the company just couldn’t see through the quagmire of real Americans:
“We had a mandate that all employees had to be vaccinated, but patriotic people have come forward, causing us to switch direction on that.”
According to the company website, they were enforcing a “zero tolerance” policy on vaccinations, but have reversed that policy after public outcry.
We reached out to Carharrt for comment and were told that while they were forcing their employees to seek a vaccination in the past, that is no longer the case. One of their interns made it well-known that it is, however, possible to get to a 225-word minimum on a satire piece without ever saying anything.
God bless America.
